Carlos Beltran: ‘I have balls’ – Rest of Mets: ‘Nope, not here’

Seriously, guys, grow a pair.

As one of four teams (Tigers, Diamondbacks, Mariners are the others) that has made a change by acquiring one of the top players in the MLB, the Mets have a right to expect a definitive change for the better over last year. In fact they have a responsibility to back up fans’ expectations with nothing less than the NL East and hopefully more (especially since the jobs of Omar Minaya and Willie Randolph hinge on the results of 2008). A positive mindset certainly helps.

Mild Mannered Carlos Beltran, the oft-ignored all-star Mets center fielder, with the voice of a pubescent Mike Tyson, made a wonderful move when he became CARLOS BELTRAN, METMASTER AND MAN EXTRAORDINAIRE, and declared (expressly to J-Roll) that the Mets were the team to beat (unlike the end of last year when thats what other teams did do to them). In Spring Training 2007, JimRo made such a statement to the media and then backed it up by leading his team to the head of the NL and nabbing himself a much deserved MVP award. The Mets helped by collapsing like a bad soufflé in a horrible food analogy.

Of course this should have been expected from someone else. Namely an actual team leader who speaks more regularly to media and such, much in the style that Jimmollins does. Guys like David Wright, Billy Wagner, Jose Reyes or Pedro Martinez (and formerly Tom Glavine) are the usual voices. Some of them did follow up Carlos Beltran’s cojones with quotes of middling to depressing results.

“It takes a special person to be able to do that…Now you have to lead…For me, I don’t think I would ever go out and say it…but hey, you know what? He’s my teammate. I got his back.”
Billy Wagner

Translation: “Few people have testicles, now you must walk with them betwixt your legs, because I cannot. I am not able to talk with testosterone (steroid free!). Fine, I will help him and we shall attempt to achieve some amount of greatness.”
Wagner did mention that he would rather demonstrate by actions on the field, but it doesn’t hurt make a few predictions. The Johan Santana move pretty much demands it…and your salary you wuss.

“We have inner confidence…I’ve said all along, I have the utmost confidence in this team to win…But just personally, I don’t feel the need to declare anything. Talk is cheap when you’re talking about February.”
David Wright

Translation: “I am either an idiot or metaphysical. I believe we can win. I do not want to say anything. Words are stupid and I may or may not be illiterate.”
On the bright side the David Wright says the Mets think they can win baseball games. He’s made the smart point that the Phillies have bragging rights as last year’s NL East champs, but he should seriously consider the fact that Miguel Cabrera is in the AL leaving him as pretty much the best 3B in the NL and therefore he should back that up with a scrotal mass that could knock down the Berlin Wall.

“I guess when you have a little baby girl it gives you confidence.”
Willie Randolph

Translation: “No comment”
COME ON! Of course, Randolph is king of ridiculous quips. When he first enforced his facial hair policy he called random players “cute.”

In my mind I believe the Mets have made the best move for the head of the pack and can and should finish atop not just the NL East, but the NL itself. The Marlins, Nationals, and Braves have made good moves to get younger and wait for the future when perhaps, the Phils and Mets will crumble (but hopefully not), but that leaves a two team race. While Pedro Feliz is an upgrade in defense and power at 3B he is an otherwise sub-par hitter and Brad Lidge remains a question mark if he can resume his dominance as a top 5 closer (and Eric Bruntlett is an outstanding backup), the Mets have made a huge wave with their biggie (and the Brian Schneider and Ryan Church replacing Paul Lo Duca and Lastings Milledge/Shawn Green breaks even in my mind). Both teams still have a few issues, but those can be ironed out in Spring Training. The Phillies have some issue with starters: Adam Eaton was awful, Jamie Moyer was below average and is only getting older, Myers is re-entering the rotation (but should be fine), and Kyle Kendrick has to back up an unforeseen rookie season. The Mets have some questions for the bullpen behind Wagner and Aaron Heilman, not to mention how Carlos Delgado will account for his out-of-whack ’07.

Final Point: The Santana Move was for NOW, back it up thusly, because that is what the fans are expecting.

14 Responses

  1. I couldn’t think of a way to effectively work this article into the post, so I will drop it off here:

    in other news…BASEBALL!

  2. Um, Phillies starters vs. Mets. You have to be kidding me. Sure Johan is an obvious upgrade but you are forgetting how Pedro’s usual season is spent mostly on the DL. The Mets also lost Glavine. And let’s not forget that the Phillies have Cole Hamels (!!!). Also, Eaton is not a gaurenteed starter since the Phillies did just get Kris Benson who will be 100% coming into May. His wife should goad mostly everybody into testosterone fueled action.

  3. That link is exceptional.

  4. Just to clarify, I am definitely not saying that the Phillies have the better rotation, Santana defies all attempts at quantifying these things. Only saying, “Don’t leave Hamels out!!!” and remember that we are looking at a rotation of Hamels, Myers, Benson, Kendrick, Moyer, with Eaton playing cleanup when needed.

    Of course, last year we had the “best” rotation, which basically spun so fast that it physically deteriorated. Goodbye Lieber and Garcia. Welcome back, Myers.

  5. Besides Hamels there is no sure bet as to who will pitch well. Myers has to bring himself back into starter shape, but otherwise has proven he is a great starter. Benson isn’t good, he is a back end starter who regularly produces an ERA in the mid 4s and that won’t get any smaller in the Piggy Bank (and also has an injury history). Moyer, while able to pitch well at points last season had horrible numbers, the only reason he had a winning record was because the Phillies would give him great run production. Kendrick still has to prove he isn’t going to have a sophomore slump like so many other pitchers and batters hit .280 against him last season.
    My point? On paper and everyone being healthy the Mets starters trump their counterpart in the Phillies rotation.

  6. I just realized…there is a really good reason why we tend to disagree over who has the better team.

  7. Haha. Yes, this is a reason I am aware of. It’s called reading the conclusion you want.

  8. Totally unbiased opinion…gun to my head I’d take Hamels-Myers over Santana-Pedro as a 1-2 this year. 3 years ago it wouldn’t even be close…but Pedro is seriously running on fumes (if you can squeeze 25 starts out of him its a small miracle in my mind).

    Everybodys saying can Kendrick bounce back after last year…what I’m wondering is can Maine? 15 wins is damn impressive, but he was downright atrocious the second half of the year. Can Ollie Perez keep his head on straight? And counting on Mike Pelfrey is just as bad (possibly worse) than looking at Durbin/Eaton/Durbin/Benson.

  9. Ok, gun to my head. I take Santana as my five-man rotation. And John Maine has proven himself.

  10. towards the end of last season pretty much every Met player posted his worst numbers. And the final spot is going to Pelfrey or somewhere between 40 and 80 year old El Duque, who has managed to pitch surprisingly well for the Mets. So most likely, Pelfrey will be in Triple-A…until he gets traded with the rest of the Mets farm system for…Nolan Ryan?


    Crap. If I knew he was that stupid he’d be kicked off.

  12. “I tried to just go up to the bathroom to shower to get all the glass off me, but I was bleeding pretty bad,” he said. “I called my parents so they said to call 911.”

    Why do people call 911 for the most ridiculous reasons, but when they actually should they don’t (or not straight away as in this case)?

  13. First baseman Carlos Delgado reported to camp on Monday and made sure to vouch for teammate Carlos Beltran, who on Saturday declared his Mets the team to beat in the National League East. “What is he going to say?” Delgado said. “We’re going to lose?”

    I would love for KC Royals or Pittsburgh Pirate players to come in saying something like “I’m prepared for a losing season.” or “The time to lose is now.”

  14. Wow. The Mets are hilarious. So is Hunter Pence.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: