Cocaine for Nerds

Fantasy baseball: to call it a cultural phenomenon would be a gross understatement. With an estimated 16 million participants in 2007, it is one of the top recreational activities in America. More Americans, in fact, play fantasy sports than do yoga. College kids play it. Investment bankers play it. I recently learned that Rush frontman/bassist Geddy Lee plays it, which, if you know Rush, is about as surprising as finding out Kate Moss does coke. So there you have it… fantasy baseball: cocaine for nerds.

I want to let you in on a secret: until last Saturday, I’d never tried fantasy baseball before. Ever. And now, like Geddy Lee, I’m hooked. Thanks to my former college roommate and good friend, whom we will call Bob, I’ve been brought into the fold. Actually, Bob has brought the whole of allswingsconsidered into the fold with his Roto-league. If you’d like to follow the action, check out our league, the Ugueth Urbina Liberation Front, here. ASC is fielding four teams: Moonlight Graham’s South Jersey Koufaxtion, Costesflamingbat’s Somerville NJ roflstompers, my own Sons of Abramoff, and Thaddeus Ballpheasant’s aptly titled Thaddeus Ballpheasants. No doubt, we face, erm, stiff competition from the likes of Jihad Pen15’s Wild Ride (ESPN is apparently cool with the use of jihad but not with penis) and others, but I like our chances.

Top moment in league action, so far: Bob, owner of the Seattle Ozzie-Ballers, flips Grady Sizemore to Jihad Pen15’s Wild Ride for, get this, Felipe Lopez. Yes, Felipe Lopez of the Washington Nationals. For Grady “the future best centerfielder in baseball” Sizemore. This move was so incomprehensible that not even Bob himself could rationalize it over gmail chat…

Bob: I was pressured
people said things
more like joe said, I need an outfielder
and then I approved the trade before realizing what happened

Congratulations, Bob, we haven’t even started the season yet and you are already a mortal lock for the Bill Bavasi Award for Excellence in Fantasy General Management. The best part is everyone in the league is now throwing out preposterous trade offers to Bob, seeing if he’ll bite. “God, I make one stupid trade and everyone smells blood in the water.” Yep.

Stay tuned for more updates on our fantasy league. Oh, And for updates on that other real baseball league too.

One Response

  1. more bob gems “god…I’m a really bad manager” “what was I thinking”

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